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Tasty Sam the Pet Cabbage

At the South Anchorage Farmers Market, Amy befriended a cabbage, and against my advice, she named it Tasty Sam.  A person should never name something she or he is going to eat, especially living organisms.  Many a plant has gone to seed because the farmer couldn’t snip snip the spinach.  For some reason, processed food with names like Scrumptious Little Debbie,  Oh Big Daddy Uncle Ben,  Dirty Old Aunt Jemimah, please please OH Yes Mr. Adams, Hot Hot Rosarita, and Give it to Me Annie can easily be eaten and weirdly enough sexualized.

Unlike the big corporate farmers, Amy tends to Tasty Sam in a loving and spiritual manner.  When Sam is sitting by his lonesome in the shade, she will put him in a bicycle pannier and pedal towards the sunshine.

Amy pets Tasty Sam

Amy pets Tasty Sam

Like any well-loved growing being, Tasty Sam became too big for his shoes.  Amy worried his roots would become root bound and deformed for life.  She didn’t want history to compare her to the Chinese men who bound Chinese women’s feet.

Unfortunately, the Girdwood Alaska Backpackers Inn does not yet have a proper grow box for Tasty Sam.  Luckily, the town of Girdwood has a community garden minutes away from the hostel.  Amy contacted Shelia who manages the community garden.  Tasty Sam, Sheila, and Amy instantly fell into place like a spring salad.  To Amy and Tasty Sam’s delight, Sheila had a small garden plot ready named 11.

Amy will never bind her veggies roots

Amy will never bind her veggies roots


Tasty Sam’s roots took instantly to the soil like a baby goats lips to its mama’s tit.
coonridege-dairy-goat

If any hostellers would like to meet Tasty Sam, just contact Amy.  She will be more than happy to take you on a Girdwood garden tour.

Posted in Food & Farming. Tagged with , , .

Averaging 2 Miles a Day

2nd California Coast bicycle ride
January to April 2009
Santa Cruz to San Diego to Santa Monica
230 miles

Our first cycling tour of the California coast (October 2008, 575 miles, 24 days), we focused on camping in nature and enjoying a love affair with simplicity. There is nothing more gratifying to know that essentially all a person needs to explore America can be transported by bicycle. Like any relationship, this infatuation matures. These new feelings led us to want more than bicycle love. In relationships with people, this might translate to choosing the company of friends instead of constantly making out.

Instead of experiencing California by rubbing ourselves day after day on a leather bike seat, firmly gripping the handle bars, enjoying the motion of legs pumping up and down, and the wind blowing through our hair as we reach downhill speeds of close to 30 mph, we chose to broaden our bicycle relationship and share our bicycle love with the coastal people.

From Love Apple Farm in Ben Lomond, California, we pedaled 7 downhill miles to Santa Cruz. Through the touring cyclist network, WarmShowers, we met Anne who took us foraging for fruit. In January, Santa Cruz had an abundance of apples and oranges. Anne had as many interesting stories to tell. We would just kick back and eat fruit while petting the dogs. At one point she mentioned her dog ate her dad’s ashes. If I’d had a ouija board, I would have loved to meet him.

foraging for oranges with Anne in Santa Cruz

foraging for oranges with Anne in Santa Cruz

We met up with Doug whom we’d befriended on our first coastal tour. He took us to his favorite place to play cribbage. It is a beautiful spot that overlooks the Pacific and sunbathing Californians. Doug wasn’t playing his best. I suppose it might have to do with losing part of his finger in a sailing accident the day before in the San Francisco Bay.

sunny afternoon cribbage with Doug in Santa Cruz, whom we met on our 1st California coast bike ride

sunny afternoon cribbage with Doug in Santa Cruz, whom we met on our 1st California coast bike ride

In Monterey, an evening at Paulo’s consisted of a plethora of ice cream choices, grappa, and Scrabble. Paulo, a native Italian, enjoys the challenge of playing Scrabble in English. Once again, I lost another game. However, I just enjoy the challenge of sitting through a game of Scrabble.

Paolo and his stack of dessert in Monterey

Paolo and his stack of dessert in Monterey

Paolo referred us to his friend, Dave, who does maintenance and decorative metalwork at TreeBones Resort in Big Sur. Dave can take a piece of forgotten metal and turn it into a flower. At TreeBones, he has a metal art studio and his wife, Cinda Lee, has a garden that overlooks the Pacific Ocean. At TreeBones, the owner believes everyone has an inner artist. When the daily chores have been finished, then its time to work on art. Cinda Lee can take a patch of dirt and turn it into fertile soil. The veggies she grows are used in the TreeBones restaurant to feed the guests. Guests are in awe of Dave’s metal work and Cinda’s organic garden. Check out our video of Dave talking about the creative process of making a handrail.

hiking Big Sur with Dave and Cinda Lee

hiking Big Sur with Dave and Cinda Lee

In Cambria, we met Anne Wyatt, owner of the Bridge Street Inn hostel. Motivated to learn about Anne’s sustainability practices as well as the business side of operating a hostel, we arranged to stay for a few days and help out with odd projects. Painting the picket fence and helping Anne’s twin sister, Aimee, with remodel work turned into six weeks of doing laundry, making beds and greeting guests. During this time, we learned about managing a hostel, had neighborhood bonfires, sat at the ocean, and went to a George Harrison party hosted by Dino who managed Dark Horse Records. Check out our video about water conservation at the Bridge Street Inn Hostel. As we packed up our bicycles to start pedaling toward New Mexico, Anne invited us to attend the upcoming Hostelling International national operators meeting in Santa Monica. We postponed New Mexico and hugged the coastline for another month in anticipation of an informative meeting.

fell in love with the hostel host lifestyle and sustainable practices of Anne Wyatt at Bridge Street Inn, Cambria

fell in love with the hostel host lifestyle and sustainable practices of Anne Wyatt at Bridge Street Inn, Cambria

In San Diego, John Alonge took us to several delicious drinking and eating establishments. We’d first met John at the Idaho Rocky Mountain Ranch, sitting on the front porch exchanging songs, poetry, and stories as the evening sun kissed the Sawtooth Mountains.

The real adventure in San Diego didn’t begin until we met up with John’s partner, Dawn, and good friend, Jim Jenkins, of Jenkins Winery. In his book The Wine Heretic, John elaborates on the idea that anything goes when it comes to wine, especially if the love of wine is what motivates. In a homemade garage still, John took some old wine from Jenkins Winery and distilled it into brandy. Anyone else would have poured it out or given it to the hired help. The Wine Heretic knows how to love all sorts of wine, even the questionable wine. Check out our video about recycling wine with the wine heretic.

John Alonge, the Wine Heretic, making moonshine in San Diego

John Alonge, the Wine Heretic, making moonshine in San Diego

From San Diego we ventured into the Inland Empire. My sister had called to ask if we would housesit. After a weekend of walking the dog and watching Cesar Milan, we stayed beyond the call of house sitting to help plant the garden and take an unexpected drive to Napa Valley.

pedaling the Santa Ana River Trail to San Bernardino

pedaling the Santa Ana River Trail to San Bernardino

We then headed back to the coast with our bicycles to bum around Carpenteria and Ventura.

camping at Carpinteria State Beach

camping at Carpinteria State Beach

The Hostelling International meeting in Santa Monica came at the perfect time during our trip “Bicycling Highway 1 into the Great Beyond.” Our only commitment was to the Coonridge Organic Goat Dairy in New Mexico. Hearing rumors from friends and family in Boise, Idaho that the snow was melting and the inversion had lifted, we began to make tentative plans to head to Boise after visiting the dairy. While at the operators meeting, we met Jaime who happens to be opening a hostel in Girdwood, Alaska. He is looking for a couple to inject some soul and personality into the project. Anyone can manage a hostel, just like anyone can poor a cup of coffee, but not just any coffee establishment can offer a coffee drinker events such as Valentines for AIDS.

So, basically, Jamie would like to give world travelers more than a cheap bunk. He wants his hostel to be a centerpiece of community involvement, music, poetry, art, and education. We were hired to infuse the hostel with unique cultural experiences that only a poet and gardener can give, and possibly a trick dairy goat named Asparagus that can slow dance to Motley Crue’s Without You.

After seven months on the Pacific Coast, we turned inland toward the goat dairy. The baby goats had almost all arrived and we need to be in Alaska in June, so we hopped on the train to New Mexico. We now have been living off the grid for a month. In fact, this blog comes to you via solar power and satellite internet. If you’re in need of a goat story, check out Goat Walking in the Wilds of New Mexico

Amy with X-Agon our goat guide

Amy with X-Agon our goat guide

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Posted in Bicycle, Travel Experiences. Tagged with , , , , .

Almost a Salty Popsicle

pedaling
the steep grade
of the curvy road
that trails off
into the horizon
has tired my legs
and mentally
worn me out

fatigue
pulls me
to the edge
of the shoulder

sleepiness
overtakes my body

I
crawl
into the grass
close my eyes
let nature reclaim
this pile of exhaustion

I stare into the sun
and murmur,
“little tick, little tick,
my blood is healthy
and thick
enjoy, enjoy
grow vigorous
and quick

“big deer,
don’t poke me
with your antlers
but gently lick
my armpits
they are mercury free
I want to be
your salty popsicle

“scary mountain lion,
I apologize
my body is lean
and somewhat trim
didn’t go to the McDonald’s
feed lot
or
graze in the grocery
snack and soda aisle
before setting out
on this trip”

yellow miracle flower growing through pavement

A yellow flower catches my eye.

It has grown
through
the pavement,
dodging cars,
not being eaten
by critters.

A flower
as miraculous
as a man walking on water.

Miracle flowers and miracle men
have the same effect
on the observer.
I find strength
to ask a passing
woman on a bicycle
for help.
I tell her I want to be strong
like the flower.

She happens to be a gardener.

Water with lemon
hits my lips
like stinging nettle tea
to a droopy plant.

A peanut butter jelly sandwich
gives me energy
like worm poop to a turnip.

My legs no longer feel wilted.

I get up off the ground.
She looks me up and down,
admiring her horticultural work.
She says,
“Your bright yellow vest
and white body remind me of a daisy.
From now on, your bicycling name
will be Daisy Spectacular.
I now
beseech you to
ride, ride,
grow towards the sun.”

steep-road

Posted in Bicycle, Follettry, Poetry. Tagged with , , , .

Goat Walking in New Mexico

When traveling on a budget and can’t afford a professional guide I recommend a goat. Traveler Brandon follows a friendly goat through the wilds of New Mexico.

The goats roam freely on a unique configuration of private and public land, (like the checkerboard pattern that Tony Hillerman writes about in his books about the Four Corners). The goats roam and graze and return home in the evening. Coonridge Organic Cheese’s delightful taste comes from the type of plants the goats graze on in the high New Mexico desert.

Brandon with Maremma guard dog

Brandon with Maremma guard dog

Coonridge goat foraging on the Wilds of New Mexico

Coonridge goat foraging on the Wilds of New Mexico

Amy hanging out with Xagon, our tour guide

Amy hanging out with Xagon, our tour guide

Watch more Earthworm Envy travel videos at tripfilms.com

Posted in Videos. Tagged with , , , , , .

Recycling Wine with the Wine Heretic

Sometimes a traveler finds the people of a city as interesting as the sites and sounds. We met up with John Alonge the founder of San Diego Wine & Culinary Center. We were given a behind the scene tour and chalked it up to, “wow, that was an interesting San Diego site.” Little did we know the real adventure wouldn’t begin until John took us to a garage and introduced us to The Wine Heretic.

John Alonge the Wine Heretic

john alonge the wine heretic

Also check out John Alonge’s guest Earthworm Envy omelet review: Drawn into the Egg-Centric Vortex

Watch more Earthworm Envy travel videos at tripfilms.com

Posted in Videos. Tagged with , , , , , .

Natural Shirley Sheep Condoms

trojan-natural-lamb-condoms

Posted in Follettry. Tagged with , , , , .

Florescent Bicycle Safety

bicycle riding safety

Posted in Follettry. Tagged with , , , , , , .

Yee ha, we’re pregnant

prenatel-genetic-testing

Posted in Follettry. Tagged with , , , , , , .

Troubled Pastor Dan and his fear of Whales

jonah and the whale by Brandon Follett cartoon

or

jonah-and-the-whale cartoon

Posted in Follettry. Tagged with , , .

Teenage Penis Curiosity

urology cartoon brandon follett

Posted in Follettry. Tagged with , , , .